Author: Ted Hubolt

3 Things That Say it’s Time to Move in Together

Is it Time to Move in with Your Partner?

You’ve been dating for a long time and now you’re wondering if it’s time to take that next step and move in together. Fortunately for you, there are plenty of indicators that not only let you know that you two can handle living together but if your partner is ready to move in with you. Before you jump the gun and ask your partner if they are ready to take that leap with you, look for these three things that say you’re both ready.

1. You spend as much time with your partner at their place as they spend with you at yours.

This might seem like a trivial thing, but having a good idea of the other person’s lifestyle is incredibly important when it comes to living with someone. If the two of you are always hanging out at your place, you might not be getting a true sense of how they live in their own place. It might have been clean the few times you visited but that could easily be because they cleaned up knowing you were coming over. However if you are there with them often it’s not likely they clean every single time just for you.

The same applies for them being at your place often enough. You want to make sure that they can handle whatever your strange quirks are regarding your personal space because when you’re living together it becomes both of your personal space. If the two of you can spend time at either person’s place and don’t have any preferences for where you’re spending time together, that’s a great indication you can live together with minimal fuss.

2. You’re not fighting all the time.

It doesn’t matter what you’re arguing about; if you are fighting with your partner often then you aren’t ready to live together. Every couple argues, there’s no doubt about it, but you need to be past whatever issues you currently have because moving in together can create a whole new set of problems. As long as you aren’t getting on each other’s cases over little things on a regular basis, you’re in a good position to take that next step.

3. You enjoy spending time together without being together.

If you’re still in the stage where when you’re with your partner you have to constantly be doing things together, you are not ready to live with each other. However, if you find yourselves doing separate things but within each other’s presence and still feeling connected to each other, you could be ready for the next step.

If all of these things describe your relationship, the best thing you can do is talk to you partner about what they want to do. Making the decision to move in together might seem simple but two people making a decision to share one life is never a piece of cake.

5 Effective Ways to Improve Your Relationship

Enhancing Your Relationship

So you’ve been dating your significant other for a while now and you’ve noticed a turn for the worse. You’re not spending as much time together, or having as much fun when you are, and you find little things bother you more often than they used to. Before you go off breaking up assuming that the two of you are just no good for each other, here are five things you can do to improve your relationship.

1. Take some time to make yourself feel good.

It might seem like a step backwards, but remember when you first started dating and you always dressed to impress? Sometimes couples who have been together for a while get used to each other and just stop taking those extra moments to make themselves look and feel good. When you feel good about yourself, your partner should notice the difference.

2. Change the way you eat.

That doesn’t mean you have to cook every meal or stop eating out, but instead of eating on the couch or someplace away from each other, eat together. Even grabbing a bite to eat out rather than running through the drive-thru instigates conversations and makes a meal feel more intimate, bringing you closer together.

3. Make time for each other.

This one seems pretty obvious, but it’s more than just making a date night here and there (although that’s also important). Your partner is supposed to be the person you can turn to for anything, but if life is all hustle and bustle when are you supposed to turn to each other? Even if it’s just a few minutes before bed, take the time to talk to each other.

4. Try new things together.

Often people lose a spark because there’s nothing new in their lives that they share, so they don’t have any new common interests. Whether it’s visiting a new restaurant or checking out a random local event, doing something different gives you a change in topics to talk about.

5. Increase physical intimacy.

This doesn’t mean you need to have more sex, but more touching. When you’re talking to your partner, touch their hand. When you’re sitting together, rest your head on them. People feel far apart emotionally when they are far apart physically.
There’s a chance you’ll do all of these things and it still doesn’t feel right anymore, and that’s fine. People aren’t always meant to be together. The most important thing you can do is give yourself the best chance for romance.

How to Know If Your Loved One is Cheating

Is Your Guy Cheating on You?

No one wants to be cheated on, and sometimes when we let our minds wander we jump to conclusions a little hastily. Still, if you’re concerned that your loved one is cheating on you, the last thing you want to do is make an unwarranted accusation that could cost you your relationship. Here are some signs that could indicate they are cheating, and that you should watch for.
Any change in behavior can be an indicator that your loved one is hiding something, but when it comes specifically to someone cheating a person tends to pull away.

This will start with conversations, even when they spend time with you they’re not talking about their day or their life and seem disinterested in yours. They may also become quickly irritated when you try and talk to them and use negative deflections to try and put you in the wrong or make you feel bad. If this is something that continuously happens without an explanation, it might be a sign that they are cheating on you.
Partners who have a generally high sex drive who suddenly seem disinterested in sex are likely to be getting that sex from somewhere else. Be sure before you bring this up that there isn’t something else going on such as depression or even a new medication that may diminish their sex drive. After you’ve ruled those out and made multiple attempts to improve or increase your sex drive, it might be time to discuss the possibility of your loved one cheating.
The biggest indicator, though, of someone cheating is constant little lies especially regarding where they’ve been. Sometimes it’s hard to know if they’re lying but when they’re caught in that lie, they’ll make more and more excuses. Many times a cheater will have one friend that they use as their back-up story for where they were, and often it’s without the friend’s knowledge, so if your partner is spending a lot of time with someone that they didn’t used to before, you might want to talk to that friend.
With all of these possible signs of your partner cheating on you, it is very important to keep in mind that any of these by themselves, or even all together, does not mean your partner is definitely cheating on you. However if you’re noticing these signs the best thing you can do is sit down with your partner, tell them what you’ve noticed, and what you’re concerned about. They may be able to relieve your concerns, but at least be prepared at the possibility your assumptions might be right.

Surviving a Big Fight

Getting Past a Nasty Spat

In relationships, fighting is inevitable. Some would even say that if you aren’t fighting with your partner occasionally, you’re doing something wrong and your relationship lacks passion. While that may or may not be an exaggeration, for the majority of couples, fights are just par for the course. Fights are rarely if ever fun, but since they do happen, it’s important to know how to deal with them and not let them ruin an otherwise happy relationship.

The most important thing to remember when it comes to fighting in relationships is to control your temper. Obviously, this is easier said than done. If controlling ones temper was easy, there’d be a lot more happy couples and a lot less fights. Sometimes, tempers boiling over are inevitable.

When our tempers do get the best of us, being able to realize when you’ve crossed a line and when you need to apologize is vital.

Too many people get into fights, say or do things that they regret, but refuse to apologize out of stubborn pride. If you say something needlessly hurtful to your partner, it’s important to acknowledge it and let them know that you feel bad about doing it. If you let these kinds of things fester, they will surely bring down your relationship. Maybe not immediately, but negative feelings do have a nasty way of building up over time.

Along the same lines, knowing how to accept an apology is also a useful skill for surviving fights. In the heat of an argument, it can be tempting to throw your partner’s apology back in their face or make them feel like their apology isn’t good enough. In the end, this will only make them resent you. Its okay to need cooldown time after getting angry, but once your head is in a better place, do your best to stay open to apologies. Don’t underestimate the power of forgiveness – it can easily make or break a relationship.

One classic piece of advice for fighting couples is to “never go to bed angry.

” The reason for this is that if you just throw up your hands and give up on a problem for the night, chances are it’ll just fall by the wayside and never really be addressed. This will almost inevitably lead to problems down the road, particularly if the same problem keeps cropping up. That said, sometimes you can’t solve a problem without sleeping on it – so the real takeaway here is that if you do go to bed angry, make sure to get some closure before too much time has passed.

Hopefully these tips will help make your next fight a little more bearable and your resolutions more successful. Good luck!

Overcome Your Fear – Asking Out Your Crush

Courage to Ask Out Your Crush

The fear of rejection is one of the most universal human fears and that fear is no more apparent than when it comes to asking your crush out on a date. You’ll sit there for hours and play out the scenario time and again in your head, thinking about what you’ll say, how he’ll respond, and where you’ll go from there. Of course, the reality never quite lines up with your expectations, and that’s what makes the whole thing so terrifying. Working through the fear and actually making your move can be nightmarish, but these tips will help you get through it.

Tip #1: Psych Yourself Up

It may seem obvious, but you’ve really got to spend some time doing this if you don’t want to choke when the big moment comes. By psyching yourself up, we simply mean reaffirming to yourself that you are worth your crushes’ time and more importantly, realizing that the worst thing that can happen is that he’ll say no. When you think about it, the stress of mulling over whether or not your crush will be into you is much harder to deal with than a one-time rejection. It’s best to just go for it, one way or the other.

Tip #2: Practice Makes Perfect

If you can’t quite work up the courage yet, try building your confidence when there’s less at stake. Go out and just ask someone else who you find attractive and interesting out, even if it’s someone you’ve never met. It’ll go one of two ways: he’ll say yes and your confidence will be boosted, or he’ll say no and you’ll realize that rejection isn’t the end of the world. Either way, it’ll move you one step closer to your end goal of asking out your crush.

Tip #3: The Backup Plan

If you still can’t get over your paralyzing anxiety, one way to approach the situation may be to have a “backup plan” that will help lessen the blow of rejection. If he says no, you can play it off like you were only asking him on a bet or something like that. He might not buy it, but it will at least defuse any awkward moments and let you save a little face.

These tips can only get you so far – when it comes down to it you’ve just got to go for it and ask the question. If nothing else, do it to put your own mind at ease!